The Last Pack of Baseball Cards I Will Ever Open

..well, I'll probably open another pack of baseball cards someday, but I think I'm through with expensive ultra-deluxe packs that burn your wallet to ash and break your heart.

In my recent posts, I've chronicled the bleak saga of unwisely spending over $500 on 9 premium packs of baseball cards. 2004 Topps Retired Signature Edition got a tight grip on me. The draw is that each pack includes an uncirculated--meaning "it comes in its own hard plastic case"-- certified autograph card of a player from yesteryear. It could be a minor star like Tony Armas or Ron Kittle. Or if you luck out and beat lottery-winning odds, you could theoretically pull someone like Hank Aaron or Stan Musial.

I've opened 8 out of my 9 packs so far. Sadly, I've pulled only "commons", most of which I had already bought for $5-10 each on eBay over the past couple months.

So it's fair to say this little investment of mine was akin to giving a homeless drifter $511.95 and in return he gave me a dead pigeon he'd been saving for a few days.

But here's my one last shot at redemption: The Final Pack. Will I save a modicum of face my pulling a good card? Maybe I'll even get a fairytale ending by pulling a great card. I'd settle for anything I don't already have, honestly. I originally planned to spread these packs out over a few weeks, but since my feelings turned from excited optimism to angst-ridden disappointment. Now I'd rather just put this whole mess behind me.

So enough talk, let's rip 'er open.

[To add insult to injury, most of the hard cases fresh from packs already had a scuff mark on the front right. Thanks a lot, Topps, for treating your cards so poorly.]

Ferguson Jenkins. Blah, already got him. And it's a Group G common (EEV [estimated eBay value] around $5-15). But at least he's a HOF'er. Not a great pull, but could have been worse.

The expensive haul of inexpensive cards

So this wraps up my tragic comedy of errors spending $500+ on cards that have an EEV around $75 total. I already owned 6 of the 9 autos. Yep, there were just three I needed, which I likely could have bought for around $30 total. I gambled and lost. Oh well, it was kinda fun for a while there. The odds were against me and I couldn't pull off a win. Lesson learned. Money drained.


Here's the checklist of 2004 Topps Retired autos, personalized for my current needs (as of 6/29/13). Red = Need it. Green = Got it. Orange = I got 2 of it (orange-for-red trade offers welcomed!)

Group A: Cal Ripken; Nolan Ryan; Carl Yastrzemski; Robin Yount;

Group B: Henry Aaron; Ernie Banks; Stan Musial; Duke Snider

Group C: Johnny Bench; Yogi Berra; Whitey Ford; Bob Gibson; Dwight Gooden; Tony Gwynn; Don Mattingly; Brooks Robinson; Mike Schmidt; Tom Seaver; Ozzie Smith

Group D: Wade Boggs; John Candelaria; Jose Canseco; Gary Carter; Carlton Fisk; Ralph Kiner; Paul Molitor; Paul O'Neill; Frank Robinson; Ryne Sandberg; Darryl Strawberry; Don Zimmer;

Group E: Buddy Bell; Rod Carew; Bucky Dent; Rob Dibble; Dennis Eckersley; Tony Fernandez; Rollie Fingers; George Foster; Ceasar Geronimo; Kirk Gibson; Goose Gossage; Orel Hershiser; Al Hrabosky; Greg Luzinski; Tony Oliva; Dave Parker; Jimmy Piersall; Alan Trammell;

Group F: Davey Lopes;

Group G: Tony Armas; Vida Blue; Tom Brunansky; Bill Buckner; Orlando Cepeda; Darren Daulton; Darrell Evans; Bobby Grich; Ferguson Jenkins; Wally Joyner; Jimmy Key; Ron Kittle; Bill Madlock; Jack McDowell; Dale Murphy; Graig Nettles; Al Oliver; Bobby Richardson; Ron Santo; Dave Stieb; Bruce Sutter; Ron Swoboda; Luis Tiant; Earl Weaver; Maury Wills;

Group H: Elroy Face