Sunday, January 26, 2014

Parallel Universe: previewing 2014 Topps' lesser-known parallels

Parallel Universe is a brand new feature I just came up with. You loyal readers out there know I like to do weird and creative things to cards, such as make my own glow-in-the-dark variations. And I also like to mess with cards in Photoshop. Well, this is like a combination of those 2 things. I'll take cards and design fake parallels that I think would be cool or funny if they actually existed. Many will be bizarrely random. Who knows, maybe a card company will stumble upon my blog and use one of these ideas in a future set! (Allow me to again brag about kinda being recruited by Upper Deck a few weeks back. If only I could have done that job from home! Oh well.)

So yeah, let's enter The Parallel Universe and examine some lesser-known (fake, made-up, for-fun) parallels in this year's forthcoming Topps flagship set.

Polka-Dot Hearts parallel, /333


With this cute variation, Topps seems to be pandering to the little girl demographic, a goldmine yet untapped by sportscards. Available in special blasters only by mail-order (see ad in Tiger Beat magazine), these are serial numbered to 333. <3 <3 <3

Sandpaper parallel, /50


It doesn't get more manly than this! Available only in Home Depot retail packs, 1:280, these parallels are printed on carpenter-grade sandpaper.

Garfractor, /1


Topps teams up with Jim Davis for this mega-hit that brings everyone's favorite comicstrip cat Garfield to baseball cards for the first time. These 1/1 Garfractors are sure to command premium prices, but holding one of these shiny beauties in your hand, you'll agree they're worth all the lasagna in Italy.

That's it for today. Join us next time.. in.. The Parallel Universe!

20 comments:

  1. Actually, I don't think we're too far from seeing cards like your polka-dot heart parallel.
    I love the sandpaper cards. Now, if only they sold packs at Home Depot. Then I'd have retail packs to buy within a mile of my house!

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  2. I love this so much. The toilet paper parallels are great for wiping your rear with that hated rival. The single ply's fall 1:2 packs, but the double ply's have some low serial numbers. Very difficult to get graded as well.

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    1. LOL, that's a good one! Those would be awesome!

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  3. For a minute I thought these were real. And for some reason, I wasn't surprised at all.

    I guess that says something about how I feel about Topps...

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  4. Garfractors! Makes me want a pan of lasagna.

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  5. Does the sandpaperfractor come in 80 or 120 grit?

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    Replies
    1. 80. But rumors are a 120 variation will be in Chrome.

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    2. I've heard that the 120 grit will be a super short print.

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    3. Super *fine* print, more like it!

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  6. I mean, who doesn't want a Garfractor? That's a must have!

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  7. Most like to have parallels of the following players:

    Polka-Dot Hearts: Grant Balfour. Nobody needs to lighten up more than the angry Aussie.

    Sandpaper: Carlos Quentin. Because he rubs me the wrong way.

    Garfractor: Pablo Sandoval. Because I'd love to see them fight over the lasagna.

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  8. Those are some awesome parallels... Makes me want to share some of the parallel universe cards I have in my collection...

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    Replies
    1. Do it! That "1975 Topps Traded" card was great.

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  9. Sandpaper parallel for the win.

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  10. Whacky Lines Parallel at the bottom of this post
    http://phungo.blogspot.com/2013/08/2014-topps-1-yasiel-puig-parallels.html

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    Replies
    1. Haha, nice! Sorry to inadvertently steal your idea.. I hadn't seen that.

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